Saturday, July 7, 2007

Where do we go from here?

THIS JUST IN: Sheik is pissed off at Dan Miloni. No, I refuse to call him by his real last name. As far as I am concerned, he is Dan Miloni. How the fuck are you going to treat the legend like this? Fuck Miloni and that jew jabronie, Doctor Von Johnson. How are you going to not invite the legend into Applebee's? This is completely unfair.

But what DID Sheiky Baby eat AT Applebee's??? This is what I'd like to know. Does he just drink beers, eat Snickers bars and possibly eat Ramen noodles. Who knows? It's one of life's eternal questions, I guess. Unfortunate, isn't it? We've uncovered all the tales that Sheiky has regaled about Takhti, Volkoff and Russian figure skaters, but we haven't figured this out just yet. Too bad he couldn't run down his preferences when it comes to ordering at Applebee's.

He loved the Original Sheik and Sabu. Apparently, some people are getting all up in arms because he called them "cousin" and "nephew", respectively. It's really just an Islamic/cultural thing that even I have used as an obvious brown man talking about close family friends. Listening to this makes me know Sheiky Baby is a true Brother, not in the Islamic sense, but just the cultural sense. Just like the Jihadi vendors that give me my lunch every afternoon and not like the Pakistani assholes on midtown Manhattan that will charge you over $2.95 for a bag of chips and a Diet Coke. I know, man.

And finally, a few words from PG-13:

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