66 Posts and Counting

I think it's a miracle that I've blogged for this long. Maybe I should step back and revel in my amazing persistance when it comes to blogging and avoiding doing a minor part of my job description in favor of doing this shit instead. Or maybe I should cry myself to sleep at night and try not to remember how awesome it was when Ms. Edwards told us in Calculus [or whatever] that she got robbed while walking through the halls of our high school. Fuck that bitch. Ms. Edwards, if you're reading this, then I'd like to let you know that you are a cunt who sucked at teaching. Thanks for passing me though, twat!



These are some highlights, some lowlights and some awkward moments in that interview shot by that dude who was accused of, like, banging little boys off the internet. You know I can't live that down. Anyways, when someone supposedly decides to download the audio of this interview, you do lose some of the luster so getting to see his facial reactions is helpful. Though it is odd when you see his fascination with pushing his chair closer and closer to the camera. Feinstein not being to read the medal is funny, but it seems like the only Jew who reads it properly is Eric Simms. I wonder if the Jewish blogging contingent is going to come after me.

If they do, then I'll be forced to recite anti-Semetic rhetoric that I learned from my elders during those madrassah-like sessions at that secret place with the jungle gyms that look suspciously like the shitty rides that were at the cement "park" two blocks away from me.

Thinking about this got me going through old photobooks trying to find my past. I've decided to put this only picture up to show all you people out there that wonder how awesome my childhood was...



THOSE WERE THE DAYS!!!!!

Feinstein Exploitation Continues

See Sheik rant about fucking Linda, Brooke and Nick Hogan. Well, Nick's going to get fucked a lot if he gets convicted of vehicular manslaughter. But maybe the dude in the car will live. Sheik gets baited into crying when he learned of Frank Gotch's death. I don't know if baiting an old man into doing things that make you entertained is something that most normal people would do. In fact, it's pretty scummy. Sheik gets to go to Madison Square Garden and stand in front of it like it's really amazing. I think the baiting of Sheik is because that just having footage of him eating a croissant just wasn't enough for them. It also speaks to the desperation of the individuals involved in order to make money. Sheik curses at some hotel or whatever and lets the accused pedophile know that he's a shooter.

Overall, what I think is this looks even crappier than the RF Sheik shoot and doesn't compare to the original MWF version that signalled the comeupance of Our Hero. I'm glad to say that I know that people on the internet bootleg this jerk's videos and I hope that it continues. If it means not having to watch some creep film another guy sleeping in bed, then even better. Although the appearance of "legendary" Tom Brandi is always a welcome sight.

Please feel free to leave comments, whether in support or in outrage or purely ambivalent. I enjoy the feedback.

Sheik's Going To Be On Howard Stern TOMORROW! AND MORE.

Sorry for the lack of updates, but I have been sick and lazy. But that's okay because this is a blog that attracts either hardcore Sheik fans, bored lurkers or aspiring sex offenders looking for Lindsay Lohan upskirt pictures from the set of "Freaky Friday".



Hell yeah. I hope this turns out great as apparently they're gonna be playing a game of Anal Ring Toss or whatever. I think this will be memorable, for better or worse. Like when Sheik walks into a room, the entire atmosphere changes. He's kind of a drunken social butterfly, so he should do incredibly well. Hopefully, he doesn't ask for crack on live radio. Let's just hope.

Below is a video with a live phone chat between Sheiky Baby and his one-time nemesis, Dan Miloni. Sheik talks about Warrior being a fag, that he's got mad love for Road Dogg and the whole Armstrong clan and that he is loyal to WWE but still watches a little bit of that TNA bullshit, since wrestling is his life. Sorry, assholes, but he's actually sober this go-around. Hey, if you're going to that MWF show where Sheik is doing a Q&A, please film it and put it up on Youtube. Oh, what am I saying? Of course it's gonna make its way on the net. Everything does.

A Good Monday To Bullshit About Sheiky

These taste good! I don't know the brands, but I learned that sambuca is sticky but nice while watching a crappy movie. Or a mediocre movie that is awesome like Team America. And Disaronno ain't bad either, although it was recommended that I mix it with something else, but fuck that shit. I need to clean these out eventually.



See, this is what I've learned to re-appreciate about wrestling: the riling of crowds. American kids care about cool moves that they can do to their friends on the concrete "playgrounds" in their inner city. But we love to hate people. Especially foreigners. I was conflicted as a kid; like, should I really be hating Sheik? He greeted me with Islamic greetings that my family would also use! Could I really hate another brother? I could always hate Nikolai, though. That anthem, man. Fuck him. I appreciate the anger that their characters riled up. It impresses me more than the actual wrestling.

Like all these smart marks love Benoit. Hey, I love him, too. But it wasn't just politics that didn't make him a star in America. It was a lack of a reason to hate him or love him. The moves, the psychology, the bumps were all there. But the public will attach themselves emotionally to those that are larger than life or represent something that means something. Sheik and Volkoff represented the Ayatollah and those Communist fuckers. They gave the people a great reason to buy a ticket and boo them out of the building.

It's a shame that Benoit could not muster those kind of emotions during his peak as a performer. It's something that both he and the people booking him are responsible for when people look back on his career.



Ahahahaha Nikolai is a cheap Jew crying over the loss of his spoon. Just tremendous. I wish they'd make a sitcom starring these two guys. "The Odd Couple" Part 2 would be something that I'd watch over any episode of "Hogan Knows Best".

I'm lazy. Back in a couple days. Going to see Mets vs. Twins tomorrow.

A Bonanza

Well, not this kind, but to celebrate the Iron Sheik's appearance on Raw in many, many years, I gotta comment on many videos today. Or actually tonight. YES. I do believe his last time on Raw was with managing the Sultan, but I did see him on the Pillman tribute Raw.

Yeah, Sheik hates Jimmy Hart. He doesn't like stooges, as Hart has always had a very close relationship with Lawler...and possibly Nick Gulas? The spitting is tremendous, as well as Sheik's need to say "no comment" before giving a short rant. That's always great.



It's definitely really fucked up that Sheik only got a bump for the three grams of cocaine that he carried over the border for Jake the Snake. That's a huge risk for someone going through citizenship issues along with dealing with the stress of not seeing his family for years. Like, damn, Sheik, what were you thinking, man? But I still believe that he should've gotten half considering that he could have gotten deported.

Sheik's got a lot of pride. The money is not an issue for him. Hitting Brian Blair where it hurts with the disses in regards to his divorce and child support. That was some low shit, haha. He should've fucked his ass and made him humble, but he was lucky, punk!

Chris Jericho is a fucking jabronie for disrespecting the Iron Sheik for calling himself Ayatollah. The philosophical debate as to where he stands in comparison to Khomeini seems to be something that will be endless. What fatwas against overhyped authors has Jericho put out, by the way?

PEACE.

Sheik Hates Adnan

Can anyone really get angry at him? Reading the youtube comments are a little disturbing. Sheik came to America at around 27 or 28 years old. Do people think he'd be an open-minded person about Iraqis that were killing people from his town, village and country? I really can't fault him for feeling this way, but it's kinda sad. Oh, Sheik hates the Mustafa gimmick and is happy that Bush went to Iraq to get Saddam.

I know that the man is set in his ways, but I wonder if somebody like Arnold Skaaland could've gathered the wrestlers to make their own version of "We Are The World"? A Sheik/Kaissey duet with a great Kamala solo would have been nice. Instead, we are left with angry wrestlers spouting off promos on Youtube. Hey, that's life.

Or whatever.

Apologies and Reviews!

I'd like to first apologize for not doing an update for the zero people that puruse this, but if you do, then, uh, yeah, sorry. I decided to do other things like eat dinner and watch shitty ECW. I know that's not a valid excuse, but this blog is not about validity, sorry.

So because I am feeling sad (or just fucking weird), I'm gonna comment on two videos. Why? Because this is a labor of love. Or just a labor. I don't get paid for this, but I am paying the price. The price of seeing Sheiky Baby's phrases dance through my brain during random and awkward moments.



The Iron Sheik bitches more about Hulk Hogan and how he loves the crack. And also that he was involved with Mr. Pat Patterson. But in what way was he involved with Patterson? Maybe they had investments? Maybe they had a secret poker game with Barry O, Barry Windham and Barry Horowitz??? Dan Mirade seems rather composed throughout all of this ranting. Sheik seems really bitter about not getting a long reign, but at least he got to defend his belt against Tito Santana. Even if Tito was "better than nothing".



Sheik rants on Andre here! He says he has no respect for that big man. I've heard that Andre used to really rough up Sheik in the ring. Like unprofessionally. Who really knows why? The claim that Andre was mean to his fans when he was a babyface might be something that needs to be looked into on andrethegiantyoutubereview.blogspot.com, which may not exist. However, the claim that he gives his autographs for free may be debatable. I bought some autographs from our favorite short-term WWF heavyweight champion of the world for $20. I probably should have invoked the MWF Dan Miloni Shoot Discount, but who knows if that would have been enough. I did see him give a free glossy to a disabled individual, so I don't doubt that he can be a good dude.

SHEIKY VALUE: This was all great. Your grandchildren will remember this. Maybe not your wife, though.

Iron Sheik Will Break Your Back

This appearance was at some convention in NYC that I ended up going to on the day after this video. Nikolai seems to have taken the anger coming from Sheik in much stride, which is commendable! I think we can all come to terms with Sheik hating Brian Blair will continue on and on forever and ever.

SHEIKY VALUE: This was great. You really don't have to come to this blog. I am going to continue on this kick until there are no more Youtube videos, which I sincerely doubt.

Also, I need video of Sheik on Derek and Romaine. It sounds great!

Wrestlecrap Allstars: Lex Luger vs The Iron Sheik

Hey, everyone! I'm really trying to make this blog work because I know there is a need for extensive analysis of everything dealing with Sheiky videos. Please help me out and click on the ad on the bottom or if you don't, then I guess I'll have to rely on my real-life job in order to pay my bills. Whatever. Anyhow, some guy from that Wrestlecrap forum made this. You got highlights of Lex Luger's infamous promo from Billy Firehawk's Cyperspace group, Iron Sheik's MWF shoot and something involving Bret Hart and hypnosis.

SHEIKY VALUE: This wasn't all that. I guess it's funny when you watch it the first time, but I never really got with it enough to want to watch this ever again. Right.

Iron Sheik goes nuts

This was uploaded by the infamous KaneRobot over a year ago and somehow became one of the most popular clips on Youtube during the time that it's been up. Can you believe there's been over 250,000 views of this clip? Me neither. I doubt Sheiky really understands how big the phenomenon is, but I have always entertained the possibility that he is secretly an entrepreneur who decided to mock-exploit himself in order to take over the internets and build his legend up to the likes of what he's believes are his contemporaries: Gholamreza Takhti, Muhammad Ali and Michael Jordan. Well, maybe not Takhti, but hey, if the man can become revered all due to shitting all over the lesser-known Killer Bee, then why not?

SHEIKY VALUE: This is still the pinnacle of all Iron Sheik rants. Don't let anyone else fool you! Sheik makes sure to tell us that he wrestled in front of 93,000 people in the Pontiac Silverdome. And that he respects Jim Brunzell, but not Brian Blair. But the threat of anal rape is likely what makes us all laugh, chuckle, giggle or shake our heads in disbelief, but it captured the attention of thousands of people. This is all so very brilliant. When your children grow up, play this for them and learn about the legend.

Jimmy Snuka versus Sheiky and L'artiste

L'artiste is some Canadian wrestler named Phil Latio and he is really the only loser in this tremendous match of titans that are Snuka and Sheik. Snuka does his impressive-for-an-old-man leapfrogging and Sheik is wearing a tremendous wrestling singlet while ruthlessly attacking poor Jimmy. In the end, only one man gets pinned and it should be too hard to guess who it is.

SHEIKY VALUE: Decent, if only for Sheik yelling at Latio to hold up Snuka while cursing at him. However, not enough trademark Sheik punches and not enough anti-American slogans screaming out of his mouth.

MISSION STATEMENT

We will review every Iron Sheik video and give our thoughts on it in long, unreadable diatribes that will go ignored on possibly the most retarded blog on the internet.

But it doesn't matter right now. We thank YOU for being a part of this. We will start from the first video ever uploaded about Sheik and continue forth with HOPEFULLY a review everyday unless one of us or the other goes on vacation. Then, our cats Conan and Brooklyn will be in charge.

That MIGHT be kinda hard for them to do. But look at them and see if YOU think they're up for the job. Or just wait for the humans to type, instead.